Ex Husband Homeschool Frustraition

Well ex husband isn't a bad dad. But there are a lot of things I DONT like about him. Which really most of the time doesn't effect anything anyway so no big deal.
I get My Little Man 1 weekend a month, 1 not 2 or more. Ex husband gets him 3 a month. Also 1 day where if My Little Man were in public school he would get dropped off by ex husband and picked up and in the evening get dropped off back at home.
But then we don't public school. SO initially I sent school work to be completed at ex husbands house. NOPE, that didn't happen. Then after a month or 2, I complained and make up scripted lesson plans. NOPE I complained and would call up ex husbands wife to explain the lessons and when ex husband came to pick up My Little Man I would go over then with him. Ex husband was uninterested. Less than half of the school work would get done. Finally  about 4 months ago he says "What time do you usually eat lunch?" "About 1" "How about I pick him up at that time so you can do most of his school work on that Saturday before." "OK"
He said he would do the rest of the work with him, did he? NOPE But he does pick him up at 1 on that 1 Saturday a month.

When I try talking to him about what we are doing for school he is inattentive and uninterested. And YET!, he complains because he thinks we are using that Saturday as a play day. He all but says I am stealing his time. >< If he would participate in My Little Man's education he would know why we do what we do. My choices in educating My Little Man are not about what ex husband likes or dislikes. They are about what is best both long and short term for My Little Man.

Inshallah 1 thing is for sure, I will not apologize for my choices for My Little Man's education. I do not have to prove to his dad, anything.

On top of all this he chooses to confront me in a hostile way in front of My Little Man, at a public event, outside in a crowd, with my husband dumb founded.

I stood there thinking "You suck. I am not going to argue. You suck. I am not going to argue. You suck. I am not going to argue. You suck. I am not going to argue. ...."

His pupils were tiny.

Over the past year or two he has been increasingly tactless and emotional when confronting issues in regards to My Little Man. I don't know what his problem is, nor do I care. 

Hmph

Well My Little Man was supposed to get 1 day's worth of school work over the 3 days at his dad's house. He did approximately 1/4th of his English lesson and that's it!
If he went to public school and needed to do 1 days worth of work at his dad's house each month it would get done. But nope.......ARG! drives me nuts!
Well Bob did apologise but this is absolutely not abnormal.
Bob offered to have Carter stay until lunch on Saturdays of the weekend My Little Man stays late so that he can get the work done for the most part at my house. I am ok with that except it means the poor guy will have school 6 days in a row the one week of the month then 4 the following week.
Oh well at least then I know he will get a fair amount done the one day.  Alhumdullilah. Well My Little Man got home at a little past 7 this evening and we started his school work at 8ish so he is wrapping up the last thing and its 12:30. We skipped 1 or 2 things and saved his math practice pages for tomorrow.
I really don't see what the problem is. I send all the lesson plans, printed out and customised for My Little Man. I print off all the materials necessary. I Send all the counters and manipulatives. I go over what the lessons will be with My Little Man the day before hand. I even go through the lessons with Bob before he leaves with My Little Man for the weekend. I am available to help.
I have suggested that My Little Man get dropped off in the morning for schooling and picked up afterward but somehow that offer is rejected each and every time.
I think Bob really just isn't thinking of My Little Man's needs at all. He thinks i am trying to steal his time but my son needs an education and he just doesn't respect me. Grr.

Meeting Goals

So when you homeschool 2 kids, or at least these 2 you cover a LOT less material in the same amount of time, but I feel like we got a lot done this afternoon none the less.
I decided this week that I would just lay put the whole week for myself as a plan instead of daily plans. Today I kinda wish I had done the daily plan thing instead. On the other hand we covered Math for My Little Man, Science for both. Did some reading/science for B, Arabic for My Little Man, Social Studies for both and a little English for My Little Man. B also corrected has papers that I had checked, this morning.
Ideally we would cover English, Math and Science everyday and Social Studies a few times a week for B and once a week for My Little Man. Also covering Arabic and Islamic Studies daily for My Little Man. Health about once a week and making sure we use the computer each week as well, other than just reading our text books.
We will just have to see what happens tomorrow. Tomorrow is the play group day. At 11 we have the one that is just a few ladies from the neighborhood and at 3 we have the one that is for a homeschool group. Also B celebrates his birthday tomorrow.
B keeps coming a couple hours later than we planned and that bugs me. I talked to his mom about it today and told her it is just not worth it if he doesn't come when planned because it just throws off the whole day. Ideally I would like to start with My Little Man at about 8:30, B at 9:00 take breaks as necessary until 1 for a nice long lunch break and end the day by 4:00. This way we have plenty of time to take breaks, send one kid off with a break if necessary while I work with the other and still have plenty of times to do things together.
At least this afternoon was better than the morning. My school boys were in good moods.

Plans for a week with B

So My Little Man is at his dad's house for the week. He will be home for a couple hours monday-friday in the mornings so we can do our Arabic and Islamic studies together. Other than that it will just be B and me.

So I am trying to figure out where he is academically. I know that his reading level is about the same as My Little Man's and that his vocabulary is a little low as well, probably as a result of the low reading level. His strongest subject is math right now, but from the assessment i gave him he is not at the same level as his peers. He seems to be behind generally in all subjects although he has nice handwriting and is certainly more mature than My Little Man. He is clearly light years ahead of My Little Man when it comes to writing.

I think B is just a bit of a late bloomer. He has a fair amount of life skills, now we just need to beef him up in academics so he will be ready for the world.

I am thinking this week he may act out a bit given it will be our second week together. Thats ok, he will probably just need to test the ground to see where he and I stand. Therefore I think i need to have a behavior plan.
If I really focus on reading, math, and writing with him I think that might be best. He said he wanted to learn about bugs so maybe having him do a lap book about bugs might be a good starting place. hmmmmm

What a week!

So we had a less than stellar day. It ended pretty good though. I wasn't actually planning on having school today but think about how little academically work we had done this week I decided that we would do a little.
While My Little Man was ok with updating his calendar he really didn't want to do anything else. ARG! We did science together which he did like but when it came time to doing a couple worksheets, in order to practice spelling, he decided he was done.
We had a long talk about choices to no end. Then I decided to pare everything down to the bare essentials and ask him how he wanted to accomplish those. That did the trick. I told him you HAVE to practice Arabic daily. You HAVE to learn something new in science each week. I and you need to show me that you have learned something new. I went down my list of 5 or 6 essentials and it clicked for him. He understood that they were essential.
I asked him how could he learn new things in science because I don't care how he does it as long as he can show me he has made some progress. He suggested playing web games for science and reading his favorite comic for English.
I told him I could work on the games thing but the comics would take a lot longer to happen. I also explained that he would HAVE to do some work alone, with out me. "I can not poop for you and I can not learn for you." He finally understood that he was going to have to do some stuff sitting down with a pencil in hand.
My point of view is, in the end he is going to have to do some writing by hand in order to be a better writer. He is going to have to practice spelling in order to be a better speller. I know he doesn't quite understand why he needs to know how to spell, despite my efforts to explain. On the other hand, frankly he hated the first lessons we had in reading but now he is the biggest book worm I know.
I am hoping he will do the same with writing. Maybe he will hate it now but in a month or 2 he will not be able to get enough of it.
I asked if he wanted to continue how we had school during Ramadan. Some lessons together them him alone doing work boxes. He said he did.
I would love to have lessons outside sometimes but i have the feeling that he would be overwhelmed by outside noises. Then again i don't know. Either way soon it will be cold and I do not want to go out in the cold. YES, I am a wimp. Hot, up to the mid 90's and I am fine. The cold, after 72 I start to complain.
LOL I am cold 3/4 of the year.
Anyway, Eid was nice, a bit quiet but nice. The past day or 2 the large family from down the block has been over to play. They are sweet little boys, wild but sweet. There is 1 child on the block that I no longer allow in my house or back yard due his discourteous and destructive behavior so i am glad my son has new little friends.
Today my Little Man was grounded due to poor choices the night before. I hated that he was grounded, especially the 10th time the kids came by, alhumdulillah I locked the front door so despite their trying they could not get in. I wanted to unground him so badly, but he had run off down to the end of the block around Isha with his little friend to his yard. He had been warned several time to stay in the back or in the house. So not only did he disobey by going out front again but he left the yard without asking and down to the end of the block where I can't see him even standing in the front yard but he did this after dark!
So Mom had to be strong and say no. When the neighbor kids came by the many many times they did I had to tell them over and over he was grounded. Actually I think by the end of the day My Little Man didn't mind as much as I did, lol. 

4th Day of school

Today we really didn't have a whole lot of work to do. Unfortunately someone's focus is at the level of a fly on caffeine.  I was very excited to have a short day. But he is still at it. He needs to draw a picture of a party with as many details as he can, then write a sentence using a descriptive word. He after 2 and a half hours has nothing on his page, not one doodle or line.
The thing is I know he loves to draw. It took him half an hour on another assignment that should have taken him about 5 minutes, 10 at the most. I don't know what his deal is.

Inshallah our next day will be better. He knows as soon as he finishes he will be done and can play the rest of the day, with the exception of emptying the dishwasher. PS he is not fasting today so that is not why.